Tuesday, April 27, 2010

My Sadness

Dear Diary, I had such a wonderful day yesterday. Harold and I took tea with Niece, to calm my nerves, and after conversation ran a little low [Niece began asking embarrassingly nosey questions] we retreated to my boudoir and sat out on the little patio where we played Scrabble. I, ladylike, and not to appear too clever, allowed Harold to win.

He is a lovely man Dear Diary, but now I am in such a quandary. His wife passed away three years ago and he is extremely lonely, and hinted, not so subtlety, that he would like a lady companion ... not mentioning exactly what he meant by 'companion'. My mind closed down refusing to accept the inference.

Do I tell him all about me? How my Darling Bobby was taken from me in the Korean War, how I was pregnant with Bobby's child and the shock and grief I suffered caused me to lose the child, a little boy, a miniature Bobby. It all came back to me as Harold rattled on; tears began to roll down my cheeks as memories engulfed me, and Harold, not realising he was treading on extremely fragile territory, was at a loss to understand my emotions.

Dear Diary, today I am staying in my room; am not even dressing into day clothes as I grieve for the past, and what my Life could have been.

Ohhhh, I am so sad. Poor Bobby, and poor Bobby Junior, we could have had such a happy life together. Blast that war!

2 comments:

Karen's Korner said...

I am sure there are many "Aunt Alices" who could tell the same story. I am enjoying reading her diary and look forward to the next entry.

Shirlwin said...

Lol Karen ... my fingers go where this story takes me. Glad you are enjoying it:)